Some Thoughts from a Trip to Florida

05/29/2007 10:44 am
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One trip through security at the airport and one thing becomes crystal clear. The terrorists have won. Any bathroom products have to be put in a clear plastic baggy, you can't bring on more than 3.4 ounces of anything. (I guess because 3.41 ounces is enough to take out the entire airport while 3.4 would go off harmlessly in your hand.) The whole process is so hopelessly feudal anyway. The fact that it's in clear plastic doesn't mean anything, they don't do chemical analysis on it. Not to mention if you have 3.4 ounces and I have 3.4 then together we have 6.8. All of this because two guys got caught mixing two things together on a plane. One guy tries to light a shoe and we all have to take our shoes off from that point on. Nobody tells you what to scan either. People were taking off their belts and scanning them because they saw people ahead of them doing it. I bet if you took your shirt and pants off and put it in the tray at least 20 people would follow suit behind you until someone finally asked "why?" (Also all it will take is one guy trying to use his shirt as a weapon and you'll have to do that anyway.)

It amazes me how much stuff there is, behind security, at the airport. At least 2 Chili's, at least 3 McDonalds, a bajillion stores, an iPod Vending Machine. There must be a ton of people going places all the time.

Between the airport and Universal Studios I'm pretty sure I was on more moving sidewalks than at any point ever. (And for craps sake people, they aren't rides)

There are these things the locals call "Love Bugs" which are 2 flies that travel attached at their back ends in a state of constant mating. In their plague like numbers, they are firmly in control of the state, or at least Orlando.

Maybe it's because I'm so used to ballparks, or because I was expecting so much worse, but the food at the parks (Or at least at MGM and Universal) is fairly reasonable.

If you go to Universal don't waste your time on the Twister ride.

I think I got 3rd degree burns at the Ocean. The waves and riptides were unreal. The beach was close to being closed because they were so bad. Also, and I've actually been to the same beach before, I didn't realize salt water was actually THAT salty.

Don't go to Universal Studios and MGM. They are essentially the same park. (And there's scary few rides at each)

The Back To the Future ride was closed at Universal, and apparently has been for a while. That makes me sad.

Within 20 minutes of being back home Sarah made me go mow the lawn. As the Sun beat down at my sunburns it occurred to me that I was laying on the beach at the Atlantic Ocean 24 hours earlier and I got kind of depressed.
face.bmpCarlos44ec - 2078 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 12:21:21 PM
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"hopelessly feudal anyway"

=futile
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - No one's gay for Moleman
05/29/2007 @ 12:35:21 PM
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Ha, hurray for spell checkers!

Obviously I meant that the Department of Homeland Security aristocracy lorded their pointless rules over us surfs hopelessly toiling away in line.
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jon.jpgJon - 2847 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 12:44:10 PM
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I went to Universal Studios once. It was as they were still in the process of building "real" rides , which is what I thought I was going to experience in the first place. So the park was kind of a letdown to me, but had some moments. The Back to the Future ride is probably the second best thing there, right behind the Terminator 3-D movie, in my experience. The Nickelodeon Slime guyser is off the charts though, because obviously nothing can compare to that. All the other "rides" just used a lot of fire and water and loudness. I thought my face was going to melt off on the Jaws ride.

Did you go to the upside down building?
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - 8953 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 01:01:30 PM
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No, though I have been there.

There really isn't much to do at either park. There was a lot of explosions at both of them though, and it's amazing to me how fast heat travels.
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vignette.bmpCarlos44ec - ...and Bob's your Uncle!
05/29/2007 @ 02:31:00 PM
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You know, I paused before hitting the Save Coment button on the feudal/futile remark, because it could truly be seen both ways. I should give you a 5 nut rating just for making me think 3x about it!
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - 8953 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 02:46:48 PM
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Obviously I meant futile.
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - 8953 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 02:51:07 PM
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The Terminater thing was still cool. Though it was sort of funny that they had a video playing of all the "positive" things "Cyberdine" was doing to make the world a "better place" (the joke being that it would make the world a scary big brother type place) In the video circa the early 90s examples include, An electronic traffic system that catches traffic violations and "auto tickets" you, facial recognition software for catching criminals in large crowds, and televisions with 500 channels that learned what you liked to watch and put something on for you if you couldn't decide/find something. There was more I'm sure but that's all I can recall.

What a scary world that would be indeed!
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Jeremy edited this 8 times, last at 05/29/2007 3:04:52 pm
vignette.bmpCarlos44ec - A Vote for me is a Vote against Terrorism! ...or atleast just wasted.
05/29/2007 @ 03:15:40 PM
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I went in 1996 and saw the same ride. we entered the park counterclockwise (as opposed to the crowd moving clockwise) and got on most of the rides (like Jaws) right away. Back to the Future was out of order then too...
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jeremy.jpgJeremy - 8953 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 03:17:23 PM
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Just to be clear I didn't mean Back to the Future was down for the week. I mean it doesn't exist anymore.
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hoochpage.JPGSarah - So's your face
05/29/2007 @ 05:42:29 PM
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It's being turned into a Simpsons ride, so it was sad, because we wanted to ride the back to the future ride together, but it was also cool that it was at least being changed to something that was relatable to us. The best part of the vacation was the ocean by far I think. Some of the rides were cool and fast and exciting, but there just weren't enough of them. At least not for the price and the lines. (which weren't even that bad) Just FYI, don't go to the airport with 3.4 oz bottles of liquids or gels because the limitation is 3 oz.
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scott.jpgScott - 6225 Posts
05/29/2007 @ 06:40:05 PM
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Those lovebugs will eat through the paint of your car. I've washed my car like 3 times since I've been in Florida.
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face.bmpCarlos44ec - 2078 Posts
05/30/2007 @ 08:44:54 AM
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I think the highlight of my trip to Florida ten years ago was Busch Gardens- that was when I shaved my head and loved rollercoasters (and the Cowboys).

You've come a long way, baby!
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - 8953 Posts
05/30/2007 @ 11:25:17 AM
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Actually the limit is 100ml, but since we insist on our dumbass system of measurements you get the nice round 3.4 ounces. Sometimes it's rounded down and some places it's rounded up to 3.5.
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sarah.jpgSarah - How do you use these things?
05/30/2007 @ 04:50:15 PM
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http://www.tsa.gov/311/
I don't know where you get your info, but this is where I get mine.
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jeremy.jpgJeremy - I believe virtually everything I read.
05/31/2007 @ 12:11:45 PM
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The consensus on that (since there's confusion due to our stupid measurements, rounding, and inconsistency) is that since some airports all 3, some allow 3.4 and some allow 3.5 the "common denominator" is 3.

Also FYI for future travelers, a 4oz bottle that has two drops of whatever left it it will get confiscated. You are allowed 3 ounces of liquid where ounces of liquid is represented by the amount printed on the bottle and not...ounces of liquid.
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vignette.bmpCarlos44ec - Knuckle Sammich
05/31/2007 @ 12:20:28 PM
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what if I brought a 40 oz on board? You know, Olde English 800 style?
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jon.jpgJon - 1000000 posts (and counting!)
05/31/2007 @ 12:21:22 PM
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can you carry on a sandwich?
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fry6beeu9.jpgJeremy - As Seen On The Internet
05/31/2007 @ 12:23:34 PM
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Yes, and an empty water bottle you can fill up once through security.
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face.bmpCarlos44ec - 2078 Posts
05/31/2007 @ 01:12:21 PM
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what if Jon's "sammich" had fake cheese in it. You know, the kind of cheese that Richard Reid would try to light on fire?
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jeremy.jpgJeremy - Robots don't say 'ye'
05/31/2007 @ 01:26:30 PM
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Well that's just one of life's great mysteries, isn't it?
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